Last week in the midst of a season of unknowns, I began to feel anxiety trying to couple with me. I felt the ice-cold tendrils of fear attempting to entangle my root system and begin corroding my faith. I knew the familiar way life began to feel like a dizzying whirlwind. But what I also knew was, I don’t have to live that way.
When I feel anxiety and fear attempting to invade like unwelcome guests, I now seek to intentionally center myself again. I go to my worship place. He is always found there. I have walked through life with my Savior long enough to recognize when I need to press in more deliberately. And I know, and I am fully confident that I never have to be afraid or anxious. He did not create me to walk with a limp. He created me to walk confidently, and at times, to run.
When these negative feelings began to creep in, I immediately stopped moving. I knew I had lost focus or step somewhere, so I asked God, “Why is anxiety trying to creep in? I had been wrapped in such peace, and now it’s gone.” Then in a flash He spoke, “You were at peace when you were keeping in step with me through this situation, but then you started trying to move faster than me, and you became afraid. I am teaching you new trust, and it is through moment by moment instruction.”
I know this is true. I saw how I had been peaceful and emerged in one answered prayer after another, and then I began to look too far into the future. God had warned me at one point, saying, “You won’t know what that step is until you walk out this step first.” But sometimes I am stubborn. Suddenly, I wanted to know everything all at once. Panic swept over me and anxiety began to close its grip.
Luckily, the grip only lasted for a breath. The deliberate refocusing I did brought immediate peace again. And there was God, waiting for me to return to Him and the place where I ran ahead.
He is a gracious God.
Now that I am so much more confident and aware of His love, I am becoming anxieties foe.
Anxiety now finds disappointment when it tries to find a landing zone in my life. I see it coming. I know its signs. But I also know the God of the universe and I’m not afraid to call on Him.
Friend, you can be free from anxiety. God is the answer. It’s going to Him and searching out what you are running from and asking God for His perspective that gives you peace again.
I realized last week, that I had begun to feel anxiety because I had suffered disappointment and suddenly worried that God wouldn’t provide. Doubt gave way to fear and anxiety. But He has a history of never failing to provide for myself and my family. So, that thought was a lie. That’s how anxiety works. You must be willing to give your life an honest look, walk in humility, and let God show you the door that let fear and anxiety in, so you can close it again.
You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You. Isaiah 26:3
Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do no give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
365 Days in the Presence 