I had a really powerful encounter with God this week.
I was thinking of others judging our decisions…like to homeschool and home church. I was imagining their criticisms and wondering if there was any merit to them. I pondered whether we were truly hearing from God or not…even though I already knew the answer. I’m of the opinion that even when you fully believe you’ve heard from God and are walking out that decision, it never hurts to check in with Him and ask if you did indeed hear correctly, or to see if it’s time to make a change.
I went to God with all the judging thoughts and arguments, I imagined people saying, “home church isn’t real church” “You shouldn’t forsake the assembly” “Your kids miss out when you don’t have them in youth group, etc” “You are not qualified to be pastoring your kids.” “Homeschooled kids are weird and unsocialized”…and to be clear, I have heard people say most of these arguments that were coming to my mind in that moment…so I know it’s not uncommon for people to take these stances…
Anyway, when I took those criticism of home church to God…He immediately spoke, “Who told you that?” I asked Him if I was causing my kids to miss out by them not being in youth group and instead having family focused life and worship…His response, “Who told you that was better to go to a church and youth group than to learn and grow within family?” It carried the tone of “I didn’t say it was better, so why would you think that?” Then I wondered if Chris and I are good enough pastors for our kids, I mean, are we valid? He immediately responded, “Who told you that you needed another person to pastor your own kids?” Our conversation kept going like that when it transitioned into school too.
The bottom line was, He was pulling out religious spirit and ideas from within my heart, that have no basis on God’s truth.
He challenged me further by saying, “How do you think the settlers and pioneers had church?” “Your family are pioneers.” “How do you think the pioneers did school?” “Where do you think the first churches were held?” “They were held in homes.”
Then I began to see, I’ve somehow ingested an idea that our family needs things that we really don’t. What we really need is to do whatever it is God is telling us to do, regardless of what others are doing.
It doesn’t make us better or worse than anyone, it simply makes us His.
We are each called to different things, and only He knows the full reason why. Knowing why isn’t our issue…obedience is all that matters. Whether I am called to do what is popular with others, or something very different from most, I am simply called to obey. Obedience and trust. The cornerstones of a walk of intimacy.
Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him, on those who hope in His steadfast love, that He may deliver their soul from death and keep them alive in famine. Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in Him, because we trust in His holy name. Let Your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in You. Psalm 33:18-22