Day 74: Will You Marry Me? (March 15)

Over the last few days, I kept feeling compelled to ask my husband if he would marry me again.  I have frequently gone to him and said, “Will you marry me?”  Each time, I felt so compelled straight from my heart to ask him this.  I even told him I had no idea why I kept needing to ask him that question, but still I asked.  It wasn’t until tonight while spending some alone time with God that He spoke to me about what I’m feeling.

I asked God, “Why do I keep needing to ask Chris to marry me again?”  He replied, “When you first married Chris, you gave him all the love you had to give at the time, but now you have recently received a greater understanding of My love for you and its opened your heart up to give more love than you have ever been able to before.” I love that my first response to an increased awareness and supply of love led me straight to my soulmate.  It led me immediately to an unexplainable and unquenchable need to share that with my mate.

How amazing is that?!

As our family has talked about love languages and I’ve shared about them with the High Schoolers that I speak with, I’ve become more aware of what makes me feel loved and I can see more clearly how God is speaking love to me right now.  I have felt so full. I believe that is part of what has awakened these sleeping places within my heart.  I am so grateful.

For many years, I have been aware that I still carry numb places inside my heart.  I have prayed over them repeatedly and asked God to breathe life into them.  What I see now is, I actually just needed my heart softened.  I was unable to fully absorb what God was pouring over me because I had dry places inside.  Oddly enough, these places have been softened through the process of writing this devotional series.  Isn’t it so amazing the way God uses our acts of obedience to begin softening us like clay and molding us into His likeness more and more.

Today I challenge you to go to the Father and ask Him if you have any hard places in your heart.  Even if you’ve asked before, ask again.  If you are already aware of the hardness, then go to Him and ask for His rain on those dry places.  Give Him full access again.  It’s worth it if it leads us to a deeper love.  There is no greater fullness than to live fully submersed in His love.  Those are the moments where He releases purpose and fulfillment over my life.

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth- for your love is more delightful than wine.  Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the maidens love you! Take me away with you- let us hurry! Let the king bring me into his chambers.  Song of Songs 1:2-4a

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and will all your strength.  Mark 12:30

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