The other day, while driving around I noticed I was feeling something.  At first, I thought I was feeling lonely, but when I looked at myself I realized I was feeling empty.  Instead of hiding from it or avoiding it, I felt God invite me to bring it to Him.  So, I did.

I handed God the emptiness.  I told Him I was feeling it and said, “I don’t know why, but I’m feeling empty God.”  Then suddenly, I knew I needed to ask God to feel the space, so I did.

It was after that when I heard Him speak to me about why.

He told me I felt empty because of the letting go season that I’m in.  I am leaving one thing behind to move on to another and there is an empty space, but He wants to fill it for me.  He wants all emptiness to lead me to a deeper place with Him.  It simply creates more space inside of me for Him to dwell.

So instead of avoiding, denying, or despising that empty feeling I will choose to embrace it.  The rest of that day, whenever I would feel empty again, I would smile and ask God to fill me even more, and He did.  I began to feel whole.  I felt peaceful.  I felt full.

I wonder, do you ever feel empty?  What do you do to fill that space?  Stay busy, avoid it, deny it, be aggravated by it?  What if the next time, you looked it straight on and asked God to fill that place?  He never denies a chance to fill us.

Take a moment and ask God to show you any empty places inside of you.  Let His Presence fill those places.  It’s an act of receiving.  We must learn how to receive.  It’s been very sobering for me to realize that one of the greatest hurdles for believers (myself included) is learning to simply receive.  He doesn’t ask us to do anything, just receive.  He is truly a good, good Father.

For this is what the Lord says- He Who created the heavens, He is God; He Who fashioned and made the earth, He founded it; He did not create it to be empty, but formed it to be inhabited- He says: “I am the Lord, and there is no other.  I have not spoken in secret, from somewhere in a land of darkness; I have not said to Jacob’s descendants, ‘Seek Me in vain.’ I, the Lord, speak the truth; I declare what is right.  Isaiah 45:18-19

For the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea.  Habakkuk 2:14

I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.  And I pray you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.  Ephesians 3:16-19

I woke this morning thinking about healing.  Yesterday, my husband hurt his arms while trying to move a fallen tree out from the middle of a road.  We are concerned he may have fractured one of them when the tree popped up and hit him.  Honestly, I know we are blessed that he wasn’t hurt worse, but when he’s trying to complete a mowing project and move our furniture in a couple of days, this feels big.

I very unapologetically believe in God’s healing power for today.  I won’t even pretend that I don’t.  You can believe what you’d like, but I’ve seen him heal before and I know it’s for us too.

Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in Me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father. And I will do whatever you ask in My name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.  You may ask Me anything in My name, and I will do it.  John 14:12-14

So, these are the moments when I ask, “What is standing between me and Your healing power being released over my husband right now?”

Then I see a shadow of doubt.  But why?  I’ve seen healing before, so why would there be any doubt at all?

I honestly can’t tell you.

This may be the most unresolved feeling devotionals yet, but I know God wanted me to share my walk through this moment with you.  I am not afraid to share this.

I hope that soon I will be writing of how God completely healed my husband and he was able to get back to doing all that he was doing, but even if I don’t, God is good.

Right now, in this moment, I know God is good and He doesn’t have to heal Chris in order to prove it to me.  When I was laying in bed and praying about it and feeling worry creep in, suddenly and very loudly, I began to hear the Rich Mullins song, “Our God is an Awesome God” play over and over through my mind.  That’s also when I began to hear God writing this devotional in my heart.  Before I got up and decided to type it out, He was scripting it. So, I know, there is something to this moment.  There is substance in the question and in the process of this.

I ask you not if you believe in healing, but do you believe God is good no matter what?  That’s where this was all headed and I didn’t know it until I typed it……Do you believe God is good, no matter what?

I’m not asking for your good “christian” answer, I’m asking if you really, truly believe in your heart of hearts that God is good.

You are good and do good; teach me Your statutes.  Psalm 119:68

The Lord is good to all, and His mercies are over all His works.  Psalm 145:9

O give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His loving kindness is everlasting. 1 Chronicles 16:34

So, now that we spoke about faulty thinking yesterday, I keep hearing the phrase, “Picking up the pieces” over and over through my mind.  I feel like now the Father wants to pick up the pieces from your shattered thoughts and resurrect them.  To bring them back into a mosaic of beauty.

I see a huge mosaic composed of millions of different pieces, but when it’s put together it forms something fantastically beautiful and unique…..You!

We are a mosaic, of sorts.  Each of us brings a lot of different memories and life experiences into our daily walk.  These pieces combine together to form our thinking and beliefs.  But when they are incorrect, they need to be rearranged.  God can take all the misplaced pieces and either remove them or re-work them to create a new picture.

Is this too abstract?  I hope not, because I often think in an abstract way.

I’m talking about being transformed by the renewing of your mind, just as scripture says.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.        Romans 12:2

God showed us that we had the need of His renewing.  I believe it will be a continual process.  We can’t escape the life situations that undoubtedly shape and mold our thinking and perception of the world around us.  It’s like we are each carrying around a suitcase of experiences and in any given situation, we open that suitcase and pull out what we feel is the appropriate way to walk through it.  But God wants to repack that suitcase.  He wants to get rid of some old “clothes” and put some new in there.

Will you let Him?

Still one last analogy has hit my mind.  It’s like we are a garden and need to be weeded from time to time.  You would not like having an overgrown garden because in time you wouldn’t even be able to see the pretty flowers and after a while the weeds would completely choke out the blooms altogether.  You wouldn’t want to be that garden, would you?

We all need pruning.  It’s ok to need it.  It’s how we were created to grow.

God, I give you full access to my heart, once again.  I long to see the world through Your eyes.  You are the only One Who knows all truth.  Thank You for loving me, in Jesus name, Amen.

 God, pick up the pieces.  Put me back together again.  You are my praise!  Jeremiah 17:14

And the God of all grace, Who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.  To Him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.  1 Peter 5:10-11

When I asked God what He wanted to speak about next, I immediately saw a person walking along and then suddenly they fell through a crack they hadn’t noticed and were gone from view.  Then God spoke to me, “You have cracks in your thought process and understanding of Me and if you don’t stay close to me you will fall through those cracks.  When you fall through the cracks you risk getting lost in your own mind.  Lost in your own faulty thinking, as you lose sight of Me.”

Then I saw that God is navigating me around the cracks in my thoughts.  He is beginning to fill in the cracks as I am learning more about Who He really is and who He created me to be.

This was a powerful vision, and I can see such truth in it.

My question is, do you believe it’s possible that all you currently believe about Who God is and who He made you to be, isn’t 100% accurate?  The most important thing I keep in view for myself is, I am human and I have a human’s understanding and it’s faulty at times, so I need to continually be aware as He reveals more and more of Himself to me, and when that clashes with a faulty belief system I carry, then I am the one with a choice.  I have the choice of being stubborn and denying He could possibly be different than I previously believed, or I can go straight to Him with the old belief and the new idea and ask Him which is true.

It’s again, all about relationship.  Living life that way makes communication with God imperative.  I remember the first time God spoke something to me that looked to be in direct conflict with how I had interpreted the Bible.  I went to the Word and the Father and searched it out until I saw my original belief was inaccurate and my history had colored the Word a certain way that wasn’t fully true.

He wasn’t mad about it, it was actually His loving kindness to point it out to me, so I could live in more freedom.

Are you willing to have your fault lines tested?

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me; and lead me in the way everlasting.  Psalm 139:23-24

When I started praying the prayer in the above verse, I had no clue how much God would do in my heart and mind, and it was hard and at times painful but always so totally worth it.  Are you ready to let God search you?  Are you willing to be tested and let God know your anxious thoughts?  Will you let Him reveal any offensive way within you?  Ouch….that one’s tough.  But then there’s the rainbow at the end….He will lead you in the way everlasting.  See!! It’s worth it.  I’m all in, again.

God, bless anyone who reads this devotional.  I pray You would gently peel back any faulty thinking they may have and bless them beyond measure.  Lord, continue to search me and know me.  I do not want to believe anything other than the truth about You, me and others.  In Jesus name, Amen.

This morning I had a thought, “Are you able to rest when life is peaceful or are you always looking for trouble?”

Some time ago, I noticed that when life got peaceful, I would start worrying that something was going to go wrong soon.  I was always expecting the worst.  Never fully able to rest.  It’s a terrible way to live.

Today, I am learning to rest in the goodness.  Our lives need not be full of drama, trials and toil.  We are not designed to live worried lives.

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.  Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?  And why do you worry about clothes?  See how the flowers of the field grow.  They do not labor or spin.  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will He not much more clothe you- you of little faith?  So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’  For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.”  Matthew 6:25-34

That should convince us, but I can still hear people saying, “I’m just a worrier, that’s who I am.”  Well, it may be how you act, but it is certainly not how you were created to be.  God doesn’t need or want your worry.  Your worry has never made anything good happen.  Worry is not from God.

I’m going to wrap up this devotional with a few more verses about worry, and then I challenge you to assess your heart.  If you are a chronic worrier, don’t you want to learn how to live in peace?  I sure do.  Blessings to you friends.  May you find the heart of Peace.

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:6-7

So don’t worry, because I am with you.  Don’t be afraid, because I am your God.  I will make you strong and will help you; I will support you with my right hand that saves you.  Isaiah 41:10

Cast your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.  1 Peter 5:7

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.  John 14:27

I see myself rising above the troubles of this life.  I am being pulled up above the clouds on wings as an eagle.  My God has lifted me up so I can see better, so my perspective can shift and I can see the bigger picture.  He is asking me to hold onto a larger view of life.  It’s often so hard to see things that are bigger than yourself.  It can be so challenging to expand your view of life to include real future plans and having courage to hold off on the “now” in order to make a firm plan for the future.

In reading the Bible it mentions:

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.”  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life?  You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  James 4:13-14

For a long time, those verses made me feel like I shouldn’t really make plans because, I can never know the future.  But as I matured in my walk, I realized it was only talking about my own plans, not God’s plans.

The Bible also speaks of those:

We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.  Proverbs 16:9

Throughout the Bible we read of God releasing a plan over a situation, and when that plan is followed there is always victory.

That’s what I’m interested in! Victory!!

Lately, as God has been literally downloading glimpses of His plan into my heart and mind, I have felt so stretched.  As He has given both Chris and I a stronger look at where we are headed, we see that self-control and waiting is a big portion of walking it out.  Waiting for God’s timing.  Listening for His leading.  It’s a day to day thing.

I wonder today, is there a plan you are walking out in life?  Have you made sure it’s God’s plan, and not just something you see as good, so God must want to bless it?  I can’t say how often I’ve done that.  His plan is the only sure-fire plan.  It’s also going to be the most satisfying and fulfilling plan.

I encourage you today, to hand off your plan to God and ask if He wants to re-write any part of it.  This will take courage, but I promise it will be worth it!

God, right now I lay before you all the plans and desires of my heart.  I know Your way is the best way, so I ask for Your vision over my life.  I surrender to Your sculpting hand.  You are the Artist of my life.  In Jesus name, Amen.

 

Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans.  Proverbs 16:3

May He give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.  Luke 14:28

This morning as I sat with my breakfast in my lap, realizing my time in PA was rapidly coming to an end and I still don’t know where we will live once we leave and this home has yet to be sold, I closed my eyes and leaned back my head with a sigh.  I began to feel anxiety trying to find a ground to develop in my heart.  Suddenly I saw a giant, brighter than white, dove descending upon me.  When I felt that Presence fall on me, I also felt an invitation, so I looked up into the dove that was covering me.  I could see into Heaven and in my vision, I walked into Heaven and felt a flood of peace.  I felt the moment when there is no care in the world.  A moment when you know everything is fine because you are in the Presence of the Lord.  Then God spoke to me, “You used to try to escape many different ways, but now I invite you to escape into Me.”

Talk about breath taking.

Honestly, I don’t know how to begin to process the wonder and love of that moment, much less write to you about something so very personal and intimate to my heart.

Guys, I hope you realize that when I share these daily devotionals, I am literally giving you a glimpse straight into the private space between God and me.  This is sacred to me.  It’s an honor to share with you.  I just wanted you to know……

Many people find escape in a bottle, drugs, and sex.  Many Christians even.  Others find escape in over-planning and following a million different paths saying God directed them, but when that’s not true others can feel it.  We know when we’re lying to ourselves too.

What God is offering today is for us to discover Him as our escape.  Escaping in heavenly things.  His Presence literally came and fell on me because He knew I needed a reprieve today.

He sees me walking well outside my comfort zone.  He knows I’m making every effort to walk boldly and unapologetically in His plan.  He knows I’m waiting on Him when I’d rather force the issue and find any place to live and make any compromise to sell this house.  But that’s not His best for me.  I’m discovering that sometimes we don’t see God’s best in our lives and it’s because we’ve decided to make other plans.  It’s not ever His fault, even though we blame Him.

He is my plan.  Not just plan A or B, He is my only plan.

My question to you is, what’s your plan?  Do you allow God to lead you, or do you ask Him to lead and then at the first sign of inconvenience or discomfort take charge and leave Him behind?  Today is a good day to give God control.  To let Him begin to lead you.  It may be hard sometimes, but it’s always worth it because He knows what’s best and He is the only One Who can lead you while seeing your entire story from beginning to end while He’s with you in the moment.  That’s a definite advantage.  Will you trust Him?

I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, My God, in Whom I trust!”  Psalm 91:2

The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, My God, my rock, in Whom I take refuge; my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  Psalm 18:2

Breathe:

I see myself walking through a field.  As I walk, my hands are open beside me feeling the tall grass and wildflowers tickling them.  This is a peaceful place and I am very aware of God’s presence there.  It seems as if the breeze carries His whispers, and the sun seems to pour out His affection upon me. I know in this moment how very loved I am.  It feels as if nothing in the world matters except this interaction with the Father.  He is the lover of my soul.

Today I am offering you a space to encounter the sweetness of a walk with God.

We’ve done similar things before, but I feel like it’s so important to be purposeful and just dwell in His delight.  He delights in you! Can you believe it?!  He also loves when we delight in Him.

So today, I’m going to leave you with some scripture and some time to take a breath.  To honor the Lord’s goodness and just spend time loving on the Father as He loves on you.

Blessed is he who comes in the name of the lord.  From the house of the Lord we bless you.  The Lord is God, and He has made His light shine upon us.  With boughs in hand, join in the festal procession up to the horns of the altar.  You are my God, and I will give You thanks; You are my God, and I will exalt You.  Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.  Psalm 118:26-29

I love the Lord, for He heard my voice; He heard my cry for mercy.  Because He turned His ear to me, I will call on Him as long as I live.  Psalm 116:1-2

Lord, You have been our dwelling place throughout all generations.  Before the mountains were born or You brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting You are God.            Psalm 90:1-2

I will praise You, O Lord, with all my heart; before the “gods” I will sing Your praise.  I will bow down toward Your holy temple and will praise Your name for Your love and Your faithfulness, for You have exalted above all things Your name and Your word.  When I called, You answered me; You made me bold and stouthearted.  Psalm 138:1-3

 

 

BREATHE………..

 

 

Today as I sit in the car and write while my husband is busy mowing a Right of Way, I heard the Lord speak to me, “Whatever it takes.”  My heart instantly flooded with pride and joy as I realized God was reminding me of the blessing it is to have a husband who will do whatever it takes to provide for his family.  I have watched that man walk in more humility than any other person I have ever known.  He is the best leader because he’s a working leader.  He’s not the type to order others around while he sits lazily in an office, no he’s the man who leads by example in the workplace, always working harder and longer than anyone else, all the while keeping a good attitude.

My husband has also been my champion.  He has studied me enough to discover the key to encouraging me.  He has done whatever it takes to earn my love and to hold it tenderly.  He is the man who has done whatever it takes to make his kids feel his love.  He strives to meet them right where they are and love them with a beautiful fatherly love.

He’s the man who went the extra mile to walk out homebirths with me.  He was required to be all in for those and he never complained.  He always said he would support me in whatever way I desired to give birth.  He always let me choose.

Even when I traveled a couple thousand miles to take our kids to AR, so I could later fly back to PA and finish packing, he never tried to orchestrate my trip.  No, he let me make all the decisions and was just an encouraging voice as I journeyed.

His voice has always been, “I believe you can do it!”

He has always been able to see straight into me and call out the strength that I didn’t know I had.  His voice gives me courage.  It comforts me.  It makes me feel bold.

Then God showed me that I have become a “whatever it takes” kind of person.  I felt His delight rest on my shoulders as He ran memories of bygone years through my mind on a reel and highlighted the moments when I’ve been solid and steady and committed to whatever it takes.

In marriage, I decided many years ago to do whatever it takes to fight for and keep a loving relationship.  With my kids, I will do whatever it takes to build a relationship with them while encouraging them to grow and leading them to become healthy and independent adults.  Even when we’ve had to make tough decisions or watch our kids walk out pain, we’ve listened to Holy Spirit and decided to do whatever it takes to help them connect with Him better.  To help them develop character.  To have a real relationship with Him.  Because in the end, that’s all that will matter.

Today is a commitment challenge.  Are you a “whatever it takes” person?  Wherever you are in life right now, are you willing to lean into God and do whatever it takes to see His plan form?  In your personal life, are you willing to do whatever it takes to live out healthy relationships?  Are you willing to do whatever it takes to encourage growth and character in those around you, even if it means standing back while they walk out the hard things?  And finally, are you willing to do whatever it takes to continue to walk near the Lord and grow in your relationship with Him?

The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter till the full light of day.  But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble.  My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words.  Do not let them out of your sight , keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man’s whole body.              Proverbs 4:18-22

When you enter into a new place or even a new season, there is a moment of saying “hello” to the new and “goodbye” to the old.  We all walk through this at some point and in a variety of different ways, but it’s how we walk that matters most.

Are you the type of person who is shut off and refuses to embrace change or anything new, or do you see that God moves us and shapes us in seasons of change?  I have not historically been in love with change, but what I’ve learned over many years, is to embrace wherever He leads me.

In the business we are in, jobs come and go, and people join and leave the team pretty regularly.  I’ve noticed that willingness to be content is a huge asset.  I’ve watched multiple times, as people move to one place or another, and seemed determined not to embrace a new place.  They shut themselves off and fight to go back to the old, but even upon leaving they are never happy, because it’s something inside that’s bothering them.  Joy comes from inside.  Resistance to joy also comes from inside.

This verse has really helped me see that:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do all this through Him Who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:11-13

God imprinted in my heart, long ago, that He wanted me to be resilient and embrace and thrive wherever He planted me.  It’s not always easy and I face rejection regularly, but it’s so worth it.  It’s worth it to walk in what He’s called me.  It’s worth it when God uses me to expand someone else’s view of Who He really is.  It’s worth it when I refuse to walk in grumbling and complaining and instead find myself in the middle of joy.  He has called me to use joy as a weapon.

Joy is not dependent upon circumstances or getting my own way.  Joy is a bubbling brook running deep inside my bones that leaves me smiling on the inside no matter what I am walking through in any given moment.  Even when I’ve faced sorrow, I still feel an underlying joy inside.  Joy is my weapon of choice now.  Just as the scripture says, the joy of the Lord is my strength.

It truly is.

That joy seems to wrap itself around every circumstance I encounter and gives me the courage and strength to fight another day.  It gives me a sense of fulfillment in any season.  It is invaluable to me.

 And Nehemiah continued, “Go and celebrate with a feast of rich foods and sweet drinks and share gifts of food with people who have nothing prepared.  This is a sacred day before our Lord.  Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!”  Nehemiah 8:10

The Lord is my strength and shield.  I trust Him with all my heart.  He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy.  I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.  Psalm 28:7